DECEMBER | 2019 | ESSENTIALS

PROBLEMATICA

The over and sometimes misuse of the word “Problematic” is problematic. A lot of us use the word to describe the way we feel after someone expresses an opinion that sends us to our feels.  Often times we use it to describe the “what”, as in what we feel, but are either unable or unwilling to describe the “why”, as in why we feel the way we do about the opinion. Problematic refers to the nature of an actual problem, with a problem being anything that involves doubt, uncertainty or difficulty, or dealing with choices of action difficult for either an individual or group at large. 

However our definition of problematic doesn’t refer to any of that as much as it refers to things we simply don’t agree with. We live in a society where labeling people who voice opinions we don’t agree with is not only a common practice, but beyond acceptable as well. We treat them as people who need to learn a lesson or be dealt with. We rush to end or cancel them because we don’t agree with their perspective, and make ourselves members of whatever lynch mob we can find to support our distaste for whatever was said. Our attempts to cancel people who hold opinions we don’t agree with is not only less than smart but hypocritical as well. 

Lets assume that Cardi B made what some would consider as a homophobic comment three years ago, and that a bored Twitter user, who is also a Barb, dedicated time and energy into looking through Cardi’s previously posted tweets in search of anything that could be deemed as problematic. They find and retweet the problematic tweet and boom, #CardiBIsOverParty is now a viral hashtag.

Detroit rapper Eminem was once seen as being problematic due to his use of word “faggot”. He initially claimed that he used the word pejoratively and that it had nothing to do with him being homophobic, but the offended minority found themselves uncomfortable with his use of the word and labeled him as problematic.

Atlanta’s Walter Lee Hampton has also worn the problematic crown by offering his 61,500 YouTube subscribers a slice of his experiences and views on all things gay and negroidian. Both Eminem and Hampton have found themselves on the precipice of cancellation, but despite the attempts of their detractors, they’re constantly being renewed for additional seasons. 

Don’t get us wrong, because there’s nothing wrong with being triggered or offended. There’s a certain sense of control that comes with knowing our buttons and when they’re being pushed. However we’ve got to be mindful to identify these feelings as ours to own. Our hurt feelings are OUR hurt feelings, and should consider this before we jump to label someone as problematic for saying something we don’t agree with--because it's not always problematic, we just don’t like or agree with it.  

Problematic opinions and beliefs are but drops of rain in a tsunami of reality, but what’s really real are the Mr. Fantastic reaches we make when we jump to identify something as being problematic. To be fair, we enjoy coming together against a perpetrator, as doing so increases our status and brings us closer to those who hold the same sensitivities as we do, but there are a couple of things we should consider before we rush to judgment. Thing one is to consider whether or not we’re taking shit too personal.

We often find certain things to be problematic because we allow ourselves to take things personally, and that’s hard to avoid when we’re personally involved. Uncle Joe doesn’t agree with the “home of sexuality”, and since we hold the keys to the front doors of the “home of sexuality” we choose to be offended and boom, Uncle Joe is now problematic. However, the sooner we realize Uncle Joe is living proof that Boomers still exist, the sooner we’ll grasp that his opinion (which he is entitled to) means nothing. 

The second “thing” is to consider is our need to challenge whatever beliefs we have about not having to adhere to the same rules and expectations we expect others to. Remember, if it's good enough for the goose, the gander can get it to. None of us are above having an opinion or belief that others wouldn’t find problematic, but since we don’t find them problematic we don’t think others should either. That’s entitlement. Third, and finally, is our inability to see and experience the world from a perspective that’s not our own. This not only explains how we ended up with [REDACTED] as our current President, but how our blindness to alien perspectives can hurt us more than they hurt the people holding them.

The long of the short of it all is that people are all entitled to their opinions. There’s no guarantee that they’ll go over well, but they are theirs to change and to express as they desire. People are equally entitled to their feelings as well, and should make a conscious effort to be accountable for them. An inability to understand these things leads to the over and misuse of what is considered as being problematic.

Problematic opinions are the what, and our relation to these opinions are the why. Finding ways to answer the question of why we’re bothered is always a good place to start, because that’s the one thing we can’t hold others accountable for. 

Classifying opinions we don’t agree with as problematic is a cop out. It forces those we push the label on to defend themselves while their accusers gleefully skate past any call of accountability. It binds people to the responsibility of navigating around how we feel, and that’s not fair. And what’s worse is the way the problematic label lingers after politically correct apologies are issued. Cardi B has since apologized for her problematic tweets and Em has gone set the record straight as well, but they’re still considered to be problematic by the hurt police. And Walter Hampton? Well he clearly doesn’t give a shit about what anyone thinks but him, so there’s that. 

But again, we can’t always place the ownership of these problematic offense on the perpetrators, because they aren’t the ones taking what they said personally- we are. And while there are things that can and should be addressed, we’ve got to have more than a bucket of hurt feelings to stand on when confronting them. These social media streets are filled with people and their opinions, and the only way we can ensure that we don’t drive ourselves mad is to make the conscious choice to consider the source, and to not be so easily offended. 

Remember this, always.